Walking by Faith

One of the first posts I wrote was about how I was hanging up my appraiser hat and trying on a new one.  I'm still not sure exactly what that other hat is, but I'm confident it's no longer an appraiser one.  I started working in an appraisal office in 1993 and started appraising real estate in 1998.  I took the plunge to start my own business in 2000 and enjoyed a successful business for many years.  It was a very demanding business, but it enabled me to buy my first two homes and live self sufficiently for many years. 


 The decision to give up my business was not a quick one.  There were many things to consider.  There were some advantages to letting it go, but some significant disadvantages too.  With the possibility of some increased travel with Brian's new position we decided that should my business pick up again it would be too much to handle with two little ones and a teenager to get to school events and practices and such.  The decision was made.  I knew that the decision would be met with some skepticism.  I figured some would understand and respect our decision and others would simply disagree with ending a career.   The decision wasn't just about turning away from appraisals, it was about turning toward something I feel strongly that God has for me.  I'm certain that is why the final decision was somewhat easy to accept.  I'm excited to find out what God has planned for me next.  


I was prepared for comments questioning our decision, what I wasn't really prepared for was the questions like "what are you going to do now if you and Brian don't work out?"  Let's be clear, I don't live under a rock.  I know what the divorce rate is in the US and I know that the divorce rate isn't any lower in our churches these days either.  People hurt each other, people give up on each other, people leave each other and divorce does happen.  Does this mean that I was supposed to keep my business running "just in case" I decide marriage to Brian isn't for me, or in case Brian decides marriage to me isn't for him?  I was thinking the other day about what kind of marriage that would be.  A marriage that never left the borders of a safety net.  A marriage without trust where it truly mattered the most.  THAT sounds like a marriage that doesn't stand a chance if you ask me.  


Brian and I would both be honest about our marriage and say that it has not been easy.  We are both amazed at the fact that we actually made it past the first year which was nothing short of a miracle.   We have our struggles and our marriage is far from perfect.  Here's where disillusionment comes in for so many (don't worry it held me for a spell too)....marriage is not perfect.  It was never intended to be perfect.  God put us together to compliment each other and help each other and to help make each other better, not to make each other feel good.  Iron sharpens iron.  Think for a second how that is done....it doesn't happen without some friction.  


I know that there is not one thing on this earth that is forever.   Nothing that you can hold in your hand can be held too tightly.  I'm not going to live in a fantasy world, and I'm not going to live in a "what if" world either.  I made a vow before God to stand faithfully next to the man that I married and that means remaining by his side especially when there is no safety net in sight.